sick of being FAT

you know when u wake up and look at urself in the mirror and then ur like "urgh!!!" and that kinda gets you into diet mode or whatever...and really motivates you, but then a few days later you forget that feeling of disgust and you fall back into your old nasty habits!! I hate that ..i hate that so much because i keep doing it. I keep thinking if I had stuck to my healthy eating plan I would be at my goal weight by now...and I have been doing this ALL year...it sucks. I just want to stick to what I am suppose to be doing and not get distracted.....why why why cant I???